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Darby O'Gill was a man of Ireland

He traveled the hills with a cup in his hand

Now in this cup was something legendary

In this cup was scalding hot tea


He traveled afar with his wondrous brew

He'd often scald people who were just like you

And every time he'd encounter a person

His hatred of people quickly would worsen


He traveled North, and then he went South

If you crossed his path, ya got hot tea in your mouth

He traveled East, and he traveled West

If you pissed him off, you got scalding hot tea on your chest


It was said when Darby was just a wee lad

He got badly scalded by his own dad

His father entered the room with a grin

and then he said "Let the burning begin".


What I'm 'bout to do you won't find fun

Cuz I've boiled the tea to the surface temperature of the sun

So Darby was burned pretty damn bad

And as you can guess, he got kind of mad


Darby would sneak into your house during the night

He'd pour hot tea in your eyes and you'd lose your sight

If there was scalding that day you'd surely know

As he'd skip o'er the hills screaming "Yardy Ho!"


When he prepared the tea you had the choice of your flavor

The taste of which no man ever did savor

You see this tea was extremely hot

If it was brewed from Darby's own pot


And so the tale goes

As many will say

Darby was strange

Some say he was gay



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